Picture this: You’re having lunch with a friend at the neighborhood cafe. They’re sitting in front of you, but it feels like they’re not even there. Why? Because they’re staring at their phone. Everyone has probably had a similar experience, whether they’re the one getting phone snubbed or doing the snubbing themselves.
I’ve been guilty of paying more attention to my screen than my companion, and I feel bad about it afterward. There’s nothing wrong with replying to an urgent Slack message or pulling up a funny TikTok to share. But I know I probably spend too much time staring at screens, and a lot of that time is unhealthy doomscrolling. These days, when I’m not using my phone, I try to be more deliberate about keeping it out of sight and out of mind. If I do need to keep my phone at hand, I always have it facedown.
It could help save your phone battery
I have a few reasons for making sure my phone screen is turned away. The first one is practical: Because my screen is facedown and won’t turn on for each notification, I can save a little bit of battery charge.
A single notification won’t mean the difference between my phone lasting the whole day or dying in the afternoon, but notifications can add up, especially if I’ve enabled them across all of my apps. If I’m in a lot of group chats, my screen might end up turning on dozens of times throughout the day (and that’s on the low side since many teenagers have hundreds of notifications a day).
It also shows that you pay attention
Keeping my phone facedown is also a good rule of social etiquette: If I’m hanging out with someone, I keep my screen hidden from view as a subtle way of showing that I won’t be distracted by it. I don’t want incoming notifications to light up my screen every few seconds, especially if I’m in a bar or other dimly lit setting. I want to keep my eyes on the person I’m talking to.
“Eye contact is one of the most powerful forms of human connection. Neuroscience research indicates that when two people make direct eye contact, their brain activity begins to synchronize, supporting more effective communication and increasing empathy. This synchrony can be disrupted when attention shifts to a phone, even briefly,” says Michelle Davis, clinical psychologist at Headspace.
When I’m with the people I’ve chosen to spend time with, I want to be fully present with them. A sudden notification will tempt me to glance at, or worse, pick up my phone in the middle of a conversation.
It minimizes your phone’s presence
I also have a more personal reason for keeping my phone facedown, and I suspect that other people have had this same thought: My phone takes up too much space in my life. I mean that quite literally. My phone is bigger than it needs to be. That’s been especially true since I upgraded from my iPhone Mini to a “normal-sized” iPhone. Yes, I got a much needed boost in battery life, but I also got a screen with more pixels to lure me into the next news headline or autoplaying Instagram reel.
A small smartphone isn’t something that really exists anymore. My phone is bigger and better at grabbing my attention. It competes against my friends and family, books and movies, the entire world outside of its 6-inch screen. It often wins. But there’s still one small thing I can do to minimize its presence: I can keep the screen turned away from me whenever possible.
It can sometimes feel like there’s no escaping from my phone. Whether that ever changes, or phones evolve into a new form factor, I can’t say. I can’t control everything about my phone, but I can control whether the screen stares at me when I’m not staring at it.
